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Etwas was mir auf dem Herzen liegt…

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Ich habe lange darueber nachgedacht ob ich dieses Thema ansprechen soll und immer wieder von mir geschoben, aber ich bin jetzt an einem Punkt, wo ich etwas sagen muss. Ich werde es auch nur einmal ansprechen und dann ignorieren sollte das Thema noch einmal angesprochen werden. Ich habe nach gewissen Gespraechen immer wieder versucht sofort zur Tagsordnung zu uebergehen, aber da ich mit Depressionen und Panikattacken zu tun habe, beschaeftigt mich das immer laenger als noetig und ich kann damit einfach nicht umgehen da es mich entweder in eine Panikattacke, oder Depression stuerzt. Natuerlich betrifft dieses Thema nicht jeden, aber ich wurde leider zu oft in den letzten Monaten darauf angesprochen und somit werde ich das jetzt generell ansprechen (als Vorbeugung sozusagen 😉 )  um in der Zukunft hoffentlich damit keine Probleme mehr zu bekommen.

Ich rede von dem leidigen Thema der amerikanischen Politik, unserer letzten Wahl und unserem Praesidenten Donald Trump. Ich finde es toll, dass die Europaer so sehr an der Politik von anderen Laendern interessiert sind, aber wenn schon Bemerkungen darueber gemacht werden, dann solltet Ihr auch bereit sein wirklich zuzuhoeren was man zu sagen, denn wir haben in den USA gelebt und wissen was hinter den Kulissen (die Dinge die man als Buerger erlebt und die Medien nicht unbedingt herumtoenen) abgeht und was bestimmte Entscheidungen von Politikern verursachen. Die Medien verbreiten nur die Sachen die sich gut vermarkten lassen und das widergeben was sie wollen und hat oftmals fast gar nichts mit der Wahrheit zu tun (das wird hier in Deutschland mit den Medien und der Politik sicher auch nicht anders sein).

Ich habe Donald Trump nicht gewaehlt und bin nach wie vor skeptisch was ihn angeht, aber ich bin es auch leid staendig angegriffen zu werden so als ob ich persoenlich daran Schuld bin, dass er jetzt unser Praesident ist. Ich habe einen anderen Blickwinkel wie viele da ich in Deutschland aufgewachsen bin und somit weiss warum die Deutschen so denken und reden wie sie es machen, aber ich habe jetzt auch 12 Jahre in den USA gelebt und weiss somit auch was dort abgeht und warum viele Amerikaner (zu denen ich nun auch gehoere) so denken wie sie es tun. Ich kann die Gruende verstehen warum Donald Trump gewaehlt wurde, aber das bedeutet nicht dass ich mit allem uebereinstimme, oder aber das damit die Probleme in den USA beseitigt sind. Die Amerikaner (die Trump gewaehlt haben) hatten es einfach satt sich von unehrlichen Karrierepolitikern an der Nase herumfuehren zu lassen und somit hatte Trump, als Nicht-politiker, eben gute Chancen. Was viele ausserhalb der USA nicht mitbekommen haben ist, dass die Medien bestimmen wollten wer in den USA gewaehlt werden soll und den Amerikanern ihre Meinung aufzwingen wollten und waren dann ueberrascht und schwer beleidigt als das in die Hose ging. Es ging vieles bei unserer Wahl ab das unehrlich und sogar kriminell war und das hatte nichts mit Trump zu tun. Das wurde selbverstaendlich nicht von den “grossen” Medien berichtet denn dann haetten sie ja zugeben muessen, dass sie etwas gemacht haben was nicht in Ordnung war.

Ich nehme Donald Trump und seine Verruecktheiten nicht in Schutz, aber ich habe auch schon einiges gutes von ihm mitbekommen das eben fast gar nicht in den Nachrichten und Berichten ueber ihn erwaehnt wird und man nur hinten herum mitbekommen hat. Er ist und bleibt ein Grossmaul, da besteht gar kein Zweifel, aber die Hasskampagnen die die Medien und Politiker und eben auch “Beruehmtheiten” seit letztem Jahr gegen ihn gestartet haben, sind echt nicht mehr schoen. Man muss einen Praesidenten nicht moegen und mit ihm uebereinstimmen, aber wenn Schauspieler und Saenger oeffentlich zugeben, dass sie darueber nachgedacht haben das Weisse Haus in die Luft zu sprengen oder dazu aufrufen den Praesidenten umzubringen, dann ist das echt nur noch widerlich und satanisch. Ich habe gewiss nicht die beste Meinung ueber Obama und anderen Politikern der Demokraten (und auch Republikanern), aber Trump mit Tod und Gewalt zu drohen, nur weil man eine andere politische Einstellung hat oder eben nicht das durchgesetzt bekommen hat was man moechte, ist einfach nur total daneben und das haette ich auch bescheuert gefunden wenn es eben einen anderen Praesidenten/ Politiker betroffen haette.

Ich habe kein Problem damit vernuenftig ueber Meinungsverschiedenheiten zu sprechen und auch meine politische Einstellung zu eroertern, aber wann immer das Thema aufkam, habe ich mich attackiert gefuehlt und immer das Gefuehl gehabt ich muss mich persoenlich und meine Amerikanischen Mitbuerger verteidigen. Ich hab darauf einfach keine Lust mehr. Ich habe mich mit Absicht in den letzten Monaten sehr von politischen Gespraechen, politischen Facebookposts und generell der Politik zurueckgezogen da ich vor unserer Wahl (und leider auch hinterher) gesehen habe wie erfolgreich die Medien waren Hass, Streit und Aggressivitaet zu verbreiten. Ich bin nach wie vor geschockt und traurig wie Leute sich so aufstacheln lassen haben, dass sie sie sich (wegen politischer Meinungsverschiedenheit wohlgemerkt) von Freunden und eben auch Familienmitgliedern abgewandt haben. Das hatte nichts mit den Politikern zu tun, denn die haben nur ihren bloeden Wahlkampf ausgetragen, aber den Medien so viel Einfluss im eigenen Leben zu geben, ist einfach nur dumm!

Warum habe ich das bisher nicht in Diskussionen angesprochen? Erstens: Ich habe nie wirklich das Gefuehl gehabt das jemand an meiner ehrlichen Meinung interessiert war, denn wenn ich angesprochen wurde, glich das eher einem Angriff: “Was denkst du denn jetzt von deinem Praesidenten?” oder “Findest du es toll was DEIN Praesident wieder gemacht hat?” Wer mag darauf schon ehrlich antworten? Der Tonfall sagte mir, dass die Person die mich ansprach nur argumentieren wollte oder aber versuchen wollte mir ihren Willen aufzuzwingen und da stehe ich gar nicht drauf. Wenn Ihr moechtet, dass ich Euch und Eure Meinungen respektiere und akzeptiere, muesst Ihr auch bereit sein das ebenfalls zu tun. Wenn ich meine Meinung mit Euch teile, erwarte ich nicht, dass Ihr es genauso seht wie ich, oder aber Eure Meinung aendert, aber wenn Ihr nur darauf aus seid mir Eure Meinung aufzuzwingen und nicht bereit seid wenigstens zuzuhoeren, dann koennt Ihr auch nicht erwarten das ich Eure Meinung akzeptiere und respektiere oder Euch zuhoere. Wir muessen nicht einer Meinung sein um vernuenftige Diskussionen zu haben, aber ich habe keine Lust mehr aufs argumentieren und mich verteidigen muessen. Wenn Ihr mich und meine Meinungen nicht akzeptieren koennt und nur mit mir vernuenftig redet, wenn wir die gleiche Meinung haben, dann koennen wir gewisse Dinge einfach nicht mehr besprechen und ich werde in Zukunft auch nicht mehr darauf eingehen wenn ich das Gefuehl habe, dass es nur wieder eine Attacke ist. Ihr duerft Eure Meinung haben, aber das darf ich auch!

Zweitens: Ich bin nicht sehr gut was verbales argumentieren betrifft und somit aggressiven Angriffen nicht gewappnet. Ich hasse aggressive Auseinandersetzungen und finde es total daneben wenn man, aus heiterem Himmel noch dazu ueber etwas so unpersoenliches, persoenlich angegeriffen wird. Ich kann mich besser ausdruecken (und auch wehren), wenn ich es aufschreiben kann (deswegen auch dieser blog post), denn dann kann man nicht unterbrochen werden und auch wirklich das sagen was man moechte.

Wie gesagt, ich kann die Deutschen aber auch die Amerikaner verstehen und warum sie so denken wie sie denken. Ich weiss auch, dass nicht jeder von Euch Diskussionen mit mir ueber politische Sachen gefuehrt hat, aber ich hatte genuegend Situationen in denen das der Fall war und ich hab einfach keinen Bock mehr das leidige Thema zu besprechen moechte aber das Ihr wisst warum ich so allergisch auf gewisse Dinge reagiere. Es ist auch total okay fuer mich, dass Ihr vielleicht anders ueber gewisse Sachen denkt, aber es waere trotzdem schoen wenn Ihr mich und meine Meinungen akzeptieren koenntet und mir nicht das Gefuehl gebt, dass ich keine Ahnung habe wovon ich rede. Glaubt mir ich habe mich sehr intensiv mit unserer Wahl und unseren Politikern sowie den Luegen der Medien befasst und hab mir meine Meinung nicht aus einer Laune heraus gebildet. Es gibt immer zwei Seiten zu jeder Situation und ich glaube wir koennten viel erfolgreicher sein etwas zu veraendern und auch besser miteinander auszukommen wenn wir bereit waeren das Gute in anderen zu sehen, andere so zu akzeptieren wie sie sind (das bedeutet nicht, dass wir so denken muessen wie sie) und vorallem vorsichtiger werden was die Glaubwuerdigkeit der Medien angeht. Ich habe bis vor einigen Jahren wenig angezweifelt, aber das hat sich sehr geaendert nachdem ich gesehen habe was fuer Luegen verbreitet wurden und es eben hinterher bewiesen wurde, dass es Luegen waren.

Ich wollte und musste meine Gedanken und Gefuehle einfach mal zum Ausdruck bringen um mit der ganzen Negativitaet besser klarzukommen und auch damit Ihr wisst warum ich in Zukunft in gewissen Diskussionen einfach das Thema wechsele oder einfach nicht darauf eingehe. Meinungsunterschiede sind in Ordnung, aber Beziehungen zu pflegen sind wesentlich wichtiger als politische Unterschiede zu argumentieren. Wenn man zu unterschiedlich denkt, kann man auch Unterhaltungen fuehren ohne diese Streitthemen zu eroertern. Ein Grund warum ich nicht zurueck nach Deutschland ziehen wollte, ist der, dass ich immer das Gefuehl habe mich und meine amerikanischen Einstellungen und Meinungen verteidigen zu muessen. Es muss nicht jeder so denken und fuehlen wie wir Deutschen und es ist okay andere zu akzeptieren auch wenn wir vielleicht nicht verstehen koennen warum sie so und so sind und denken. Der Himmlische Vater hatte seinen Gruende warum wir so unterschiedlich sind und in unterschiedlichen Laendern/ Kontinenten leben. Ihr als Personen seid mir wichtig und deswegen moechte in Zukunft auch Streitgespraeche und ungute Gefuehle so gut es geht vermeiden.

It takes over gradually…

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I have been slipping into this depression slowly. It is strange, I can feel it happening, but I can’t stop it. Over the last few weeks, I have had my trial times, but it wasn’t that bad yet. The last two days were rough though. I know it is bad when I feel like crying all day long and I know that if I would start crying, I would not be able to stop that quickly. Plus, I am not really a crier and so feeling like that is not easy for me.

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Moving to Germany has been a blessing and a trial.I love the fact that I am so much closer to family and friends, and that I can just spontaneously decide to visit someone. My sister only lives 3 hours away from us now, and it is so wonderful because I get to see her, my brother-in-law and cute niece a lot now. I love that I get to go to family events and functions and can actually be part of family get-together again.

The hard part is that because of my mental illness, I feel lonely, unloved and unwelcome very quickly and I can’t stop these feelings because it is part of my illness. 😦 I have made a few wonderful and nice friends in this area (where we live) and love spending time with them, but the overall feeling from everyone else is: I don’t belong here and I am not wanted. I know that this is mostly in my head, but there is truth to it and that makes me miss my beautiful Chula Vista/ San Diego and wonderful friends from that area even more. I miss being able to hang out with my friends and meet up with them for lunch and dinner and I certainly miss my gorgeous San Diego temple. I have had these feelings of homesickness on and off, but it has gotten a lot worse over the past 2 weeks.

I try to do what I can to get myself out of it, but it isn’t as easy as it sounds. You can’t just snap out of a depression, it just doesn’t work that way.

I am struggling immensely with this homesickness and depression right now, and wish I could just go back to being normal, but these feelings have to be worked through and that takes some time. I am just so grateful for the few wonderful women (in this area) who have been so kind and welcoming because, if it wasn’t for them, I would feel a lot worse. I am just sad because one of them is moving away in a few months. People warned me about this before we moved, that because this area is extreme with moving away or coming into the area, you don’t really get to feel part of it because of the constant change. I was hoping that because everyone is away from their relatives and friends, it would be a more tight-knitting group, but that’s not my experience so far. Maybe it is me, I don’t know, and I just don’t fit in here. I am just sad because I seemed to fit in okay where we lived before.

I am sure things will look up again in a while, but right now I feel pretty sad and disappointed which worsens my depression. I have had a lot more problems with my anxiety this week, and it is getting harder and harder for me to get motivated to do things or be around people. I try to push myself when I can though because, even though anxiety does hold me back and even isolates me at times, I don’t want it to take over completely. I have days and weeks when I just don’t have the strength or desire to push myself, but I do it when I can. Having so much family and relatives around, certainly helps me with that. 🙂 Hubby and I also just signed up for dance lessons at a local dance school and I am really excited about that. It is the little things that make me keep going and give me something to look forward to. My family (and also my friends) are definitely a huge part of me keeping going and fighting through these times of difficulties. I am so grateful for the many wonderful friends, I had and have in my life and that helps me to see some positivity, even if I feel lonely and not welcome. There is a lot of good in life, even if it doesn’t seem like it for a while.

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Depression and how to not get sucked into too much negativity…

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Depression has been part of my life for quite a while now. One thing I noticed over the years was the fact that when I am not careful, incoming negativity can affect me and my depression a lot more (and very intense) than it has in the past. I seem to be going through phases in which I can focus mostly on positive stuff for a while, and try to share that with those around me, but as soon as I am paying too much attention to the not so good things, it seems to consume me very quickly and drags me down big time. I think that’s Satan trying to use the illness I have to make my life even more miserable and hard to bear. It is frustrating, but now that I am aware of it, I can and have to make drastic changes to stay away from it.

I think I also have become a lot more sensitive to things going on around me and am trying harder to find the positive in others because I have seen the opposite happening to me and I don’t like it. I strongly believe that unless we know a person personal, or at least have seen a person (in the public eye for example) and watched their behavior for a while, we can’t really judge what they are really like. Politicians and celebrities should have the chance to show what they are like and then we can make up our mind, but they should have a fair shot. If they don’t use that chance wisely, well that’s their own fault, but we should give them a chance at least.

I have to say, that the past US election has made me aware of many unkind things going on in the world, even with friends and relatives, and it makes me sad. I know that nobody is and will be perfect in this life, but I think we should all work very hard on becoming more Christlike. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ love everyone, no matter who they are and what they are doing, and we can do that too. Loving someone, or at least caring for someone, doesn’t mean we have to approve of what they are doing, or have to agree with them, but we can be kind. I have been preaching about real tolerance for the longest time and yet people only seem to be wanting to be tolerant when they want someone to be tolerant with them, but they don’t want to be tolerant in return.

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It is easy to be influenced by anger, negativity and even hateful behavior when we let the media and even people around us dictate us how we should think and feel about a person. I have been a victim of that myself and I am not proud of that because I am so much happier when I try to see the good in people and when I give people the chance to show me who they really are. Some turn out to be the way we were told that they would be, but many surprise us in a good way.

If we truly want to change this world for the better, we need to focus on the good things and need to remember how the Savior treated people. I have decided to make that my goal for 2017. I don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions, because it is so easy to just give up on them, but goals are things that keep us moving forward. I feel like that Satan has his hands in everything now and whenever we fight with each other, belittle, mistreat or hate one another, he is winning and is successful in dividing us as family, friends and brother’s and sisters. I was getting very involved in politics for a while, but it caused so much aggression and tension in my own life, not to mention me witnessing how people talked to each other and became enemies about silly things, that I am not willing to deal with that any longer. There are so many things out there nowadays that try to divide us and if we listen to the media, celebrities and other voices that try to tear us apart, we are following Satan and not our Heavenly Father. Satan is luring us in with little things because he knows when we do those, the big things will follow. Are we truly willing to sacrifice the best things we have and the most amazing people we have in our lives just so we can feel better about something for one second? We will find out at one point that the cost was too high to sacrifice people and things Heavenly Father has given to us for a reason. He loves all of us and He will always love us no matter what we decide, or whether or not we follow Him or Satan, but we will have to face consequences some day and we have to decide now on what team we want to be.

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Fighting with each other over politics, really?

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When I became a citizen almost 2 years ago, I was excited for my first presidential election and for the chance of making a difference. I was so frustrated with our current government and knew something needed to happen. Things haven’t gotten any better since then, in fact it’s gotten worse. Our government, including our president, don’t seem to care much about us as citizens and I am sick and tired of all their false promises, dishonesty and their arrogance. All they care about is themselves!

Sadly, as I was watching this election come to an end, I also noticed that it caused a lot of drama between people. It is heartbreaking to watch how people interact on social media and how they have a go at each other simply because one person has a different opinion than the other one. I am so tired of political correctness and how some people are allowed to say what they want and others can’t, otherwise they are called names and the other side is offended by it. It is so frustrating to say the least.

I think Satan has his hands in this big time. It just disappoints me how some people behave and how they think their behavior is okay. Our government is way too big now because it makes them think they are in charge and have all the power over us. If people would just understand, that “We the people” are the one’s putting them there and that they should only have very little power, things would be so much better and different. Government shouldn’t be there to run our lives. The government is also not supposed to make all the decisions by themselves, and many of us don’t seem to notice how they take over more and more. It’s like the story of the frog that was put in warm water. If it had been hot from the beginning he would have jumped out right away, but because the water was turned up gradually, he didn’t realize what was happening until it was too late. That’s where we are right now. We are getting burned big time!

I was very involved in politics for a while and the result was that a lot of things really ticked me off (and still do) and I wasn’t able to discuss politics with certain people anymore. I am so over all of this and can’t wait until this has come to an end. It doesn’t matter who wins the election because the top candidates are not good for the job. Hillary is plain evil and Trump might have his good qualities (who knows), but his mouth certainly isn’t showing it. On top of that I think both of them just care about themselves and not us. Nothing is more important to Hillary than being the first female president and she will do what it takes to get there no matter how evil and wrong it is, and Trump is so busy trying to show how corrupt politicians are, he puts his foot in his mouth every single time. Sigh! He did two good things though, he made America aware how corrupt our government, candidates and leaders really are, and people are starting to look at our other parties too. Many people are surprised that there are more parties, but maybe it is a good thing that our two big parties have such horrible candidates because other people finally get noticed as well.

It is tiring though that I have to constantly defend myself, my country and our so-called candidates whenever I speak to someone here in Europe. I wish people would stop believing the lies of the media (they are just as bad as our politicians) and start researching things more, but that’s not going to happen any time soon. The way some friends and relatives attack and think about our US candidates is astonishing. The sad thing is, it is very much one-sided. If they would feel that way about both candidates, fine, but the hatred over here to one candidate is ridiculous. Oh well. I think I just have to start refusing to discuss politics and just leave the room if the other person won’t stop talking about it.

One thing is clear though, the outcome of this election will not be a good one because no matter who wins, the other side will be unhappy and very angry about it. For the first time in these past 2 years, I am grateful that I am not in the US when this election takes place and afterwards either. Things are not going to be pretty from now on.

Those of you who are reading this, please do yourself, and everyone else, a favor and don’t attack the people you disagree with. We can have different opinions, views and beliefs and still like each other. If you find posts on social media irritating, just unfollow that person for a while. I have unfollowed quite a few lately and that makes my newsfeed a lot more bearable. 😉 We don’t have to discuss certain things with those around us. Sometimes friendships are best, when some things are left unsaid. I have started staying away from this election garbage as much as possible and it feels so great. Obviously I can’t avoid it completely, but I am getting there. Sometimes I think all I want to do is crawl back to bed, pull my blanket over me and stay there until this darn election is over. But there is more to life and I would miss out on many beautiful things. Plus, friendships are important to me and we should work on those every single day. A stupid election shouldn’t ruin that. Let’s focus on the good things in life, share positive thoughts and experiences, and worry about the things that are really important. 🙂

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Love is the language of the heart…

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Love is definitely a wonderful and powerful word. To make love work we have to do something, and we need to listen to our hearts to know what someone else might need, or is trying to say. Love surely is an action word, but that doesn’t mean it is easy. Loving someone else can be the most beautiful thing, but it can also be a heartache, trial or even seem impossible.

Love often ends up in marriage and that is not as easy as it sounds or looks. It is something both partners have to work on every single day, and both have to be  100% committed that they want to make it work no matter what.

I love my husband and I am grateful we have been married for 12 years now. I see that as a blessing because in today’s world it is just not a normal thing anymore. Of course we have our ups and downs, and sometimes we dislike each other quite a bit, but our love is still there and as long as we both stick to our goals and commitment, we can make it.

It does break my heart when I hear about people breaking up or getting a divorce. Of course there are times when a marriage needs to be broken apart (like when one is abusing the other, physically or mentally), but in my experience it is for many just an easy way out because they don’t want to deal with the hard and difficult times. They want to run away from problems which, most of the time, can be worked out. I know that saying that is very risky because many don’t seem to think that way anymore and they definitely don’t agree with me on that, but I still believe that with all my heart. I know that Heavenly Father puts people together for a reason and we can only achieve what he wants us to achieve if we are willing to work through everything, even the hard times.

Satan certainly uses divorce to get to the family and destroy as much love and feelings as he can. It makes me sad because he seems to have a lot of success lately and it doesn’t even seem to bother most people that families are breaking apart and that unkindness, hatred and evil is spreading everywhere around us.

It is tough to hang on sometimes because we are different and come from different backgrounds, families and sometimes even countries and cultures, but when we agree to do what we can and when we make Heavenly Father part of our “partnership” anything and everything is possible. He loves us more than we can imagine and if we have Him by our side, we can love those around us as well.

I wish I could help those around us understand that they shouldn’t just give up because things are tough, but that they should keep fighting the good fight. I know I can’t because many don’t even listen. They are so set on knowing that there isn’t a solution, and that things can’t be worked out, that they just don’t hear what other people might have to say. Again, of course there are times when a divorce is helpful and important, but the world makes us believe now that the numbers should go up instead of down and that there are many cases that need to be broken up. I disagree with that and I think that we could change that kind of thinking if we were only willing to fully trust the Lord and work hard on sticking together. A good marriage doesn’t just happen. We have to work together and help one another to grow and become a better person. One meaning of love is: a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person. We can have constant affection for someone and not like what they do or say. We can give our heart to someone and still be ourselves.

Goethe once said: “If you treat a man as he is, he will remain as he is, but if you treat him as if he were what he ought to be, and could be, he will become what he ought to be, and should be.” Once we start treating each other in such way, things will change. Once we start seeing one another like that we can truly love each other and make this world and our families a better place.

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Can we make a difference?

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I have been thinking about the horrible things that are happening right now. Instead of getting better, it is getting worse and I have to say it is not only scary to watch but very sad. It just breaks my heart to see around me so much hate, misery and anger. It seems to me that evil is spreading contention faster than we can think, and it is successful in reaching the hearts of many.

But why do we let evil influence us so much? Why do we listen to the lies of politicians and the media and believe people that make no secret out of their corruption and dishonesty? Why do we listen to people who tell us bad things about others instead of getting to know the person first and listening to what our heart tells us? Why do we listen to “leaders” who try to divide us in every possible way? Why is it so hard to accept a person for who he/she is? Why is it so hard to understand that tolerance and acceptance doesn’t mean we have to agree with someone’s choices, lifestyle and opinions but we can still be kind, compassionte and gracious?

With worry I have watched the aggressiveness of many on social media when someone said or posted something the other person didn’t like. I have watched people attacking and unfriending each other simply because they were of a different opinion. I seldom respond to contentious comments now because the way I see it, there is no reason to argue, fight and contend because it just causes bad feelings and possible losing of trust and even friendships. Is it worth it?

Sometimes the best thing we can do, when someone disagrees with us on something, is to acknowledge the difference of opinion and move on. We will never be able to force someone to change their mind unless they are willing to do so. I know how I am, and when I am convinced that I am right and I feel good about it, there is nothing anyone can do about it. Trying to force your opinion and view on me, just makes me angry and upset because I feel like you expect me to respect you, but you are not willing to do the same in return. We can discuss it, but we have to accept that we might have to agree to disagree.

I love my family and friends, but sometimes I just can’t discuss certain things with them because I know they completely disagree with me and I don’t want to destroy my relationship with them. When they get too annoying and aggressive I can always respond in a fair but sarcastic way. 😉

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Humor helps me through a lot and the way I see it, there are always ways to make relationships work no matter how much you disagree. I have had many times when I didn’t understand how the other person can feel or think that way, but they probably think the same way about me. Aggression and hate will never be the answer. Satan wants us to follow him and he wants all of us to feel alone, unloved and miserable. We don’t have to give in to him though and can stay strong. We can do what is right, stand up for what we believe in and still cherish our loved ones even if they disapprove and disagree. Let’s show the world that love is stronger than hate, good is stronger than evil. We can do anything as long as we have God by our side.

“One individual can begin a movement that turns the tide of history. Martin Luther King in the civil rights movement, Mohandas Ganhi in India, Nelson Mandela in South Africa are examples of people standing up with courage and non-violence to bring about needed changes.” (Jack Canfield)
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Brexit, and my two cents…

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Obviously many are talking about the split between the UK and the EU right now. Until like 3 days ago I didn’t even know about it and was surprised when I heard what was going on. Once I learned about Brexit though, I was bombarded with many different opinions on the subject. It’s been very onesided so far, and I have yet to hear a British person explain it to me, but it is clear that a lot of European’s think that Britain just made a huge mistake, that the way they voted was plain wrong, and that it was stupid to leave.

I have to admit at first I gave in to all the negativity and agreed with those around me, but after learning a little bit more about it, and picking up bits and pieces on social media, I thought I have to hear both sides of the story before I can form an opinion.

I was born and raised in Germany, but I have lived in Scotland for a little over 1 1/2 years and then lived in the US for the past 12 years. I think because I have actually lived in different countries, and been around different cultures, it is easier for me to step back and give different sides a chance to share what they think because I learned how important it is to listen so I can fully understand why a person does what he/she does or why they think a certain way.

One thing that has been bothering me for the past years was how opinionated others are about things they know little or even nothing about. I have had several conversations with people (arguments even) in which outsiders were trying to tell me about OUR politics or things going on in OUR country and it was obvious they were trying to convince me that I had to change my mind and think like them. Ehm, excuse me, but who do you think you are? What gives you the right to tell someone who lives in the actual country, what they should vote, believe, think and feel? That person lives there and you don’t! They know better than you what is going on in THEIR own country. The best response (I am being sarcastic here) I ever got was that their media is more truthful than the media of our own country. I have to admit I was stunned for a moment that anyone could think that way, but apparently that is a pretty common opinion here in Europe. Wow. As far as I am concerned, today, you can’t really trust any media anymore because they will twist the truth as much as they have to, to make a story more exciting and “special”. It doesn’t matter where in the world you live, that happens everywhere. I believe that there are only a few journalists left who actually report the truth, but political correctness and all that garbage makes it even more difficult to be honest. The media seems to care more about a good story than the actual truth.

Each of us, who lives in a certain country, knows better than outsiders what is going on in that country. I have been away from Germany for so many years, I wouldn’t dare to tell them what they should think or feel, never mind getting involved in their politics. I don’t know enough to get involved. When you live somewhere you know what is happening and how decisions, your politicians make, effect you and what the results are for you. As an outsider you only hear what the media tells you, but you don’t know how it truly is for those who live there.

Britain voted and the people there made a decision. Whether it was a mistake or not is not for us to decide. We can have an opinion on the matter, but we should be open to listen to them as well (and I am talking about the actual people, not celebrities, the media or politicians). We don’t know why they voted the way they did and so we shouldn’t judge it. They had their reasons and instead of attacking them for what happened, maybe asking them why, would be the better way? If we try to understand their point of view, it might be easier for us to come to terms with it and who knows, you might even agree with them. Unless you walk in someone else’s shoes, and I mean you walk in those shoes and not ask another person to do it for you and then tell you what it feels like, you don’t know what it is like.

truth is knowledge

There are people out there that make uninformed decisions and vote based on what others tell them to do, but not everyone is like that. A lot of people do their research and vote (or decide) based on what feels good and right to them.

It is time for us to be more understanding. I think we can all agree that we wouldn’t want anyone else to tell us what we should vote, decide and think, so why do it to others? If we don’t want outsiders to tell us what to do, why is it okay for us to do it to them? Brexit might turn out as a bad thing, but it could also be a good thing for the people in Britain. Only time can tell and in the meantime we should make every effort to at least try to understand that there are people out there who think, believe and feel differently than we do. Tolerance goes both ways, you know. 😉 I always like to share the actual meaning of the word tolerance since so many people don’t seem to know it: Tolerance is the willingness to accept behavior and beliefs that are different from your own, although you might not agree with or approve of them.